TUESDAY MORNING REVIEW #4
It's getting tighter at the top as the top four teams in the league are only separated by 14 points. If not for the nightmare of a week for The Spongebobs, this would be anybody's game at the quarter pole. The Cyhawks held onto their lead, but all three teams behind them gained ground. The Dominator remained in the top 2, while The Dragons made the leap of the week, going all the way from last to third. Plan Z settled into their comfy 4th place chair, while The Spongebobs, heretofore known as The Schizos, dropped back to last. The updated standings (Week 4):
Cyhawks 399.18 (91.77)
The Dominator 394.84 (97.89)
The Dragons (104.66)
Plan Z 385.10 (98.81)
The Spongebobs 342.77 (48.91)
Most teams in the PPFFL had multiple players sitting the week out because of byes. The one team that actually had to choose who should play across the board again made an egregious error. When Plan Z was faced with which Moss to play, they chose the wrong one. Randy (7.25) got into the end zone for the Raiders, which is a major feat in itself, but only had that one reception for 5 yards. Santana (31.90), meanwhile, was running all over the place against Jacksonville, totaling nearly 200 yards receiving and 3 TDs. The difference between Santana and Randy once again would have put Plan Z atop the standings at week's end, making Plan Z the first two time winner of the "I Sure Wish I Would Have Played That Guy Award". (Plan Z also waived Marc Bulger who had a huge week against the Lions, the point being that if Plan Z waives someone, you might want to jump on the chance to acquire that player and watch him rack up major points for you.)
At the top of the standings, the Cyhawks were carried by the Falcons D (25.00) and the baddest 5'9" man in football, Steve Smith (20.35). Smith is conistently the only guy Jake Delhomme thorws to, yet he still abuses opposing defenses. Who will be the first defensive coordinator to see the obvious and quadruple cover him? It's not like Jake will go out of his way to throw to anyone else...put 9 guys on Smith and he will still try to force the ball in there. Rudi Johnson had a solid week (13.55), but Matt Hasselbeck (7.37) came crashing down to earth against the Bears, meaning the Monsters of the Midway have wrested the title of "best defense from a major, smelly, cold city" from the New York Giants...or at least they have in Hasselbeck's opinion.
The Dominator bounced back from a lethargic Week 3 to make up some ground in the standings. The backfield of Peyton Manning (32.89), Steven Jackson (19.30) and Ronnie Brown (13.55) did the majority of the damage. His wide receivers, Larry Fitzgerald (6.55) and Darrell Jackson (8.10), were done in by the stout defenses of Atlanta and the Bears, which impacted the standings for not only him, but the Cyhawks and Dragons, as well. In the "unexplained event of the week" the Rams defense (7.00) actually earned points even though they gave up 34 points to the anemic Lions. The next few weeks will be key to the survival of The Dominator as he will be on the road and will have to try to monitor his team while away from the comforts of home. Wait a minute, he basically plays the same guys every week, so....nevermind.
The Dragons put up the biggest score in Week 4. Of course they were carried by the arm and legs of Dunavun McNabb (39.11). The Bears defense (16.00) and Clinton Portis (18.00), of the rejuvenated Redskins offense, also had nice weeks. Not to be discounted is the contribution of Pfc. Kellen Winslow, Jr. (10.55) on the battlefield of the Network Associates Coliseum. Please don't take that comment as being tongue-in-cheek, as the people who attend Raiders games are only slightly less scary than the people wandering the streets of Baghdad. In fact, the Raiders have been named the "Official Team of the Insurgency". Let's hope the insurgency meets the same fate as the Raiders, and is rendered impotent as soon as possible. In what may be a positive sign in the battle in Iraq, Ayman al-Zawahiri, the head of the insurgency, has been spotted in Baghdad wearing a shiny white sweat suit with multiple gold chains, and has begun slicking his hair back with the finest oil available.
Plan Z is again wondering what may have been and is trying really hard not to let dissention tear their team apart. Jack is the ultimate "Sunday Evening QB", especially when he found out Santana Moss was the stud of the week, not Randy. He went from cheering heavily for Larry Johnson (26.10) and Ron Mexico (17.61), to wondering why nobody listened to him when he said he felt a big game from Santana was coming. Alex chimed in that Jack never said that, which again made Jack shout, "We should have drafted Peyton Manning!" Lost in the constructive criticism among the braintrust was the great pick up of Maurice Jones-Drew (19.95) who is becoming the jack-of-all-trades for the Jags. And, in what was a down week for the Ravens defense (9.00), they still got positive points against one of the best offenses in the league. Maybe Week 5 will be the week that the braintrust of Plan Z comes together and puts the right team out on the field for the first time...if not, there might be some hair pulling and punching in the owner's box.
Woe the Spongebobs. They had by far the worst week of the season for anybody. Hurt by a late week scratch (Brian Westbrook) and Bengals defense (-2.00) that was torched at home by the Patriots, they slid way back in the standings. It will take a few solid weeks to get back into the thick of things. The performer of the week was super sweet and sensitive, but rarely repsected, QB Tom Brady (24.31) who tore apart the Bengals. In what was basically a zero sum game, the Spongebobs played their QB against their defense, meaning anything good was going to lead to something bad. Methinks there might be a flurry of player of movement for Bikini Bottom's finest this week....although, considering the number of transactions Bob has made the last two weeks, we might want to predict this week will be a blizzard.
Remember, the standings determine the order of transactions, so The Spongebobs go first, followed by Plan Z, The Dragons, The Dominator, and the Cyhawks. Get your injury and waiver wishes in as soon as you can and remember to submit those starting lineups for Week 5 by Thursday.
The Commish
It's getting tighter at the top as the top four teams in the league are only separated by 14 points. If not for the nightmare of a week for The Spongebobs, this would be anybody's game at the quarter pole. The Cyhawks held onto their lead, but all three teams behind them gained ground. The Dominator remained in the top 2, while The Dragons made the leap of the week, going all the way from last to third. Plan Z settled into their comfy 4th place chair, while The Spongebobs, heretofore known as The Schizos, dropped back to last. The updated standings (Week 4):
Cyhawks 399.18 (91.77)
The Dominator 394.84 (97.89)
The Dragons (104.66)
Plan Z 385.10 (98.81)
The Spongebobs 342.77 (48.91)
Most teams in the PPFFL had multiple players sitting the week out because of byes. The one team that actually had to choose who should play across the board again made an egregious error. When Plan Z was faced with which Moss to play, they chose the wrong one. Randy (7.25) got into the end zone for the Raiders, which is a major feat in itself, but only had that one reception for 5 yards. Santana (31.90), meanwhile, was running all over the place against Jacksonville, totaling nearly 200 yards receiving and 3 TDs. The difference between Santana and Randy once again would have put Plan Z atop the standings at week's end, making Plan Z the first two time winner of the "I Sure Wish I Would Have Played That Guy Award". (Plan Z also waived Marc Bulger who had a huge week against the Lions, the point being that if Plan Z waives someone, you might want to jump on the chance to acquire that player and watch him rack up major points for you.)
At the top of the standings, the Cyhawks were carried by the Falcons D (25.00) and the baddest 5'9" man in football, Steve Smith (20.35). Smith is conistently the only guy Jake Delhomme thorws to, yet he still abuses opposing defenses. Who will be the first defensive coordinator to see the obvious and quadruple cover him? It's not like Jake will go out of his way to throw to anyone else...put 9 guys on Smith and he will still try to force the ball in there. Rudi Johnson had a solid week (13.55), but Matt Hasselbeck (7.37) came crashing down to earth against the Bears, meaning the Monsters of the Midway have wrested the title of "best defense from a major, smelly, cold city" from the New York Giants...or at least they have in Hasselbeck's opinion.
The Dominator bounced back from a lethargic Week 3 to make up some ground in the standings. The backfield of Peyton Manning (32.89), Steven Jackson (19.30) and Ronnie Brown (13.55) did the majority of the damage. His wide receivers, Larry Fitzgerald (6.55) and Darrell Jackson (8.10), were done in by the stout defenses of Atlanta and the Bears, which impacted the standings for not only him, but the Cyhawks and Dragons, as well. In the "unexplained event of the week" the Rams defense (7.00) actually earned points even though they gave up 34 points to the anemic Lions. The next few weeks will be key to the survival of The Dominator as he will be on the road and will have to try to monitor his team while away from the comforts of home. Wait a minute, he basically plays the same guys every week, so....nevermind.
The Dragons put up the biggest score in Week 4. Of course they were carried by the arm and legs of Dunavun McNabb (39.11). The Bears defense (16.00) and Clinton Portis (18.00), of the rejuvenated Redskins offense, also had nice weeks. Not to be discounted is the contribution of Pfc. Kellen Winslow, Jr. (10.55) on the battlefield of the Network Associates Coliseum. Please don't take that comment as being tongue-in-cheek, as the people who attend Raiders games are only slightly less scary than the people wandering the streets of Baghdad. In fact, the Raiders have been named the "Official Team of the Insurgency". Let's hope the insurgency meets the same fate as the Raiders, and is rendered impotent as soon as possible. In what may be a positive sign in the battle in Iraq, Ayman al-Zawahiri, the head of the insurgency, has been spotted in Baghdad wearing a shiny white sweat suit with multiple gold chains, and has begun slicking his hair back with the finest oil available.
Plan Z is again wondering what may have been and is trying really hard not to let dissention tear their team apart. Jack is the ultimate "Sunday Evening QB", especially when he found out Santana Moss was the stud of the week, not Randy. He went from cheering heavily for Larry Johnson (26.10) and Ron Mexico (17.61), to wondering why nobody listened to him when he said he felt a big game from Santana was coming. Alex chimed in that Jack never said that, which again made Jack shout, "We should have drafted Peyton Manning!" Lost in the constructive criticism among the braintrust was the great pick up of Maurice Jones-Drew (19.95) who is becoming the jack-of-all-trades for the Jags. And, in what was a down week for the Ravens defense (9.00), they still got positive points against one of the best offenses in the league. Maybe Week 5 will be the week that the braintrust of Plan Z comes together and puts the right team out on the field for the first time...if not, there might be some hair pulling and punching in the owner's box.
Woe the Spongebobs. They had by far the worst week of the season for anybody. Hurt by a late week scratch (Brian Westbrook) and Bengals defense (-2.00) that was torched at home by the Patriots, they slid way back in the standings. It will take a few solid weeks to get back into the thick of things. The performer of the week was super sweet and sensitive, but rarely repsected, QB Tom Brady (24.31) who tore apart the Bengals. In what was basically a zero sum game, the Spongebobs played their QB against their defense, meaning anything good was going to lead to something bad. Methinks there might be a flurry of player of movement for Bikini Bottom's finest this week....although, considering the number of transactions Bob has made the last two weeks, we might want to predict this week will be a blizzard.
Remember, the standings determine the order of transactions, so The Spongebobs go first, followed by Plan Z, The Dragons, The Dominator, and the Cyhawks. Get your injury and waiver wishes in as soon as you can and remember to submit those starting lineups for Week 5 by Thursday.
The Commish
posted by Patrick Zalasky at 9:08 AM
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