Tuesday Review v2.5
Apologies for the lack of a Monday Memo for this week. Part of the braintrust for The Bouncers needed a chaperone for a field trip to Colusa to see what a working trapping camp looked like back in the 1840s. I have to say that it was a very informative and entertaining trip, my favorite part being when the camp leader tore into some parents for coddling the kids he was yelling at for breaking a rule he explained less than 5 minutes earlier.
Week 5 showed little change in the standings, but came with even more separation between the top, middle, and bottom. Right now, we have three distinct races going on: One for first; one for third; and one for fifth.
Current Standings (Week 5):
The Maestro 650.31 (127.60)
Kellogg Krushers 648.04 (130.79)
The Dragons 528.55 (74.30)
The Bouncers 527.08 (73.51)
The Outlaws 476.45 (88.33)
The Dominator 473.09 (78.34)
Our league was plagued this week by a rash of starters who ended up sitting for medical reasons. Practically every team was affected by this, none moreso than The Bouncers, who saw three of their starters held out. ESPN.com will come under fire from the PPFFL if they don't start doing a better job disseminating injury information. Or, it might be helpful if I kept a little better track of things. To be fair to myself, though, on Friday morning, the Worldwide Leader listed Joe Addai, Marvin Harrison, Ahman Green and Todd Heap as all likely to start on Sunday.
This week's "I Sure Wish I Would Have Played That Guy" award was a tough one to call because of the byes and injuries that decimated most of our rosters. There still has to be an award, though, so we give it to The Dragons this week for playing Terrell Owens (3.25) instead of Reggie Wayne (16.30). T.O. was atrocious on Monday Night Football, dropping a number of the good passes that Tony Romo managed to throw while he was getting picked off by nearly every citizen of western New York. I didn't see T.O.'s postgame Q&A qith the media, but assume it went something like this:
Media: Terrell, tell us a little about this incredible win.
T.O.: It was a great win for our team. It's great to be undefeated. Our quarterback sucks.
M: Romo threw 5 interceptions, but he also made some good throws that you dropped...how do you explain that?
T.O.: I didn't drop anything out there. I don't know what game you were watching. Steve Young didn't have any problems throwing me the ball.
M: What about the 2-point conversion you dropped?
T.O.: That pass wasn't even close. Jeff Garcia wouldn't have put it where the defender could have knocked it away with the fingertip of his glove.
M: Okay, what about the one you dropped after the onside kick? Folk would have only had to make about a 40-yarder if you caught it.
T.O.: What am I supposed to do? Donovan would have thrown it to me more often earlier in the game so that I was already in a rhythm. A good quarterback knows that.
M: Terrell, why are you wearing an astronaut helmet and nothing else?
T.O.: (Doing crunches) I don't know what you're talking about, man.
The Maestro held onto the top spot for another week, even though his slim lead got even slimmer. Consistency was the key as Tom Brady (37.30), Larry Fitzgerald (24.80) and Jason Witten (23.15) made up for the first bad game of the season for Randy Moss (5.30) and the vacation day taken by Joseph Addai. Maurice Jones-Drew (16.05) had his first big game of the season, in spite of Jack Del Rio. Watching the Jags and Chiefs on Sunday, it was hard to figure out Jack of the River. MJD rushed for nearly 100 yards on less than 10 carries, and broke a couple of screen passes for nice gains, but seemed to only play on 3rd down. Fred Taylor is a nice back, but shouldn't be getting 75% of the carries when other teams can barely tackle the little bowling ball. It would seem that MJD would be the feature back because 5 or 6 yards per carry is better than 4, and having a back that can catch the ball is nice when none of the receivers can (if you can really blame them when David Garrard is the one throwing the ball).
Nearly posting an octuple double were the Kellogg Krushers. Charles Johnson (1.15) was the only one to miss double figures on a team that was led by one of our greatest Americans, Brett Favre (34.94). Joining him north of ten points were Ronnie Brown (21.65), New England's defense (18.00), Dallas Clark (15.45), Reggie Bush (14.95), Steve Smith (12.65), and Nate Kaeding (12.00). Brown has been resurgent lately, posting his third straight big game. That's not easy to do playing for the Fish. It will be even tougher now that Trent Green is out with a concussion and Cleo Lemon will be taking the snaps. Green isn't exactly a dangerous gunslinger, but has enough of a reputation to make teams respect the pass a little. Lemon has the reputation of being crummy, meaning opposing defenses will be putting 10 guys in the box to stop Brown. If Miami's offensive coordinator is like a lot of others in the NFL this year (cough, Niners, cough), he will still try to run the ball all the time while throwing screens and 3-yard outs, then wonder why the team isn't scoring any points.
Heading the second tier of teams in the PPFFL are The Dragons. If not for a savvy move (forced by a bye for Philadelphia) to Phillip Rivers (33.75) at QB, this may have been a really bad week. As it was, Rivers, along with the Bears defense (12.00) and about a third of what we saw from LaDainian Tomlinson (10.00) last season were enough to keep a tenuous hold on third place. Frank Gore (6.75), Marques Colston (5.55) and our buddy T.O. (3.25) were only slightly better than the trio The Bouncers started that all ended up sitting out their games. On the bright side, Jason Elam (3.00) kept the broncos from being shut out at home by San Diego, although, if you had the Broncos and 37 points, you lost.
Riding the right arm of Peyton Manning (39.96) and a bunch of guys who were held out of their games were The Bouncers. It might behoove them to have their organizational meetings prior to Thursday of every week so that they can have more time to come up with alternatives to guys who might be sketchy at to whether they will be playing. Just a couple of extra points, added to what Marshawn Lynch (6.90), Jeremy Shockey (9.65), the Ravens defense (9.00), and Mason Crosby (8.00) did would have vaulted these guys into the top half of the standings. It's a new franchise, so it is understandable that there will be a learning curve. At least they aren't in the bottom third of the league, where we find...
...The Outlaws, who had the best week of the bottom four and pulled themselves out of the basement. It's nice to be able to say that after all of the roster shuffling last week. Tony Romo (28.03) was somehow able to have a respectable fantasy night when it appeared he was going to surpass Rex Grossman's Monday Night debacle last season. The Giants defense (14.00) was a nice addition to the squad, as was Lavernaeus Coles (12.45). Heath Miller (12.20) and Willie Parker (8.10) did fairly well as the Steelers hammered one of the three totally inept offenses that call the NFC West home. There is no division in the National Football League that has more unimaginative, inept offensive coordinators than the NFC West. The Seahawks, Niners, and Rams all seem to have decent offensive talent, but none of them can get out of their own way on offense. Only the Cardinals have managed to put points on the board consistently, possibly because they have a coach with the sack to yank Leinart and play a guy with the arm to get the ball to their talented receivers. Maybe the rest of the teams should take some notes, not on yanking their QB, but on actually throwing the ball to the wide receivers. Oh, and not running the ball into the middle of the line on every 3rd-and-8.
Bringing up the rear, in very unfamiliar territory, is The Dominator. Being nearly 180 points out of first place is nothing to panic about after only 5 weeks, but getting behind by that much in only 5 weeks should at least raise some eyebrows. This team has had major problems at QB for most of the season, and wasn't looking too good after Derek Anderson's (23.59) 1st half in New England. Fortunately, Anderson bounced back with an Eli in the 2nd half and threw a couple of meaningless TDs while running up some nice yardage while his team was being blown out. Antonio Gates (21.65) had a nice game in the thin Rocky Mountain air, but that's where the good news ends. Neil Rackers (11.00) and the Jacksonville defense (9.00) were 3rd and 4th in points for this team, which is bad news. Kickers and defenses should not be relied upon for scoring, what they contribute is usually just icing on the cake. Icing that could be the greatest in the world still wouldn't change the crummy taste of the cake if it is made up of Edgerrin James (5.85), Clinton Portis (4.55), and Deion Branch (2.70). Maybe The Dominator needs Portis to take the rest of the squad to a back country dog fight somewhere to release the tension, build some team cameraderie, and get these guys back to playing at the high level we saw in Weeks 1 and 2.
Notes:
Apologies for the lack of a Monday Memo for this week. Part of the braintrust for The Bouncers needed a chaperone for a field trip to Colusa to see what a working trapping camp looked like back in the 1840s. I have to say that it was a very informative and entertaining trip, my favorite part being when the camp leader tore into some parents for coddling the kids he was yelling at for breaking a rule he explained less than 5 minutes earlier.
Week 5 showed little change in the standings, but came with even more separation between the top, middle, and bottom. Right now, we have three distinct races going on: One for first; one for third; and one for fifth.
Current Standings (Week 5):
The Maestro 650.31 (127.60)
Kellogg Krushers 648.04 (130.79)
The Dragons 528.55 (74.30)
The Bouncers 527.08 (73.51)
The Outlaws 476.45 (88.33)
The Dominator 473.09 (78.34)
Our league was plagued this week by a rash of starters who ended up sitting for medical reasons. Practically every team was affected by this, none moreso than The Bouncers, who saw three of their starters held out. ESPN.com will come under fire from the PPFFL if they don't start doing a better job disseminating injury information. Or, it might be helpful if I kept a little better track of things. To be fair to myself, though, on Friday morning, the Worldwide Leader listed Joe Addai, Marvin Harrison, Ahman Green and Todd Heap as all likely to start on Sunday.
This week's "I Sure Wish I Would Have Played That Guy" award was a tough one to call because of the byes and injuries that decimated most of our rosters. There still has to be an award, though, so we give it to The Dragons this week for playing Terrell Owens (3.25) instead of Reggie Wayne (16.30). T.O. was atrocious on Monday Night Football, dropping a number of the good passes that Tony Romo managed to throw while he was getting picked off by nearly every citizen of western New York. I didn't see T.O.'s postgame Q&A qith the media, but assume it went something like this:
Media: Terrell, tell us a little about this incredible win.
T.O.: It was a great win for our team. It's great to be undefeated. Our quarterback sucks.
M: Romo threw 5 interceptions, but he also made some good throws that you dropped...how do you explain that?
T.O.: I didn't drop anything out there. I don't know what game you were watching. Steve Young didn't have any problems throwing me the ball.
M: What about the 2-point conversion you dropped?
T.O.: That pass wasn't even close. Jeff Garcia wouldn't have put it where the defender could have knocked it away with the fingertip of his glove.
M: Okay, what about the one you dropped after the onside kick? Folk would have only had to make about a 40-yarder if you caught it.
T.O.: What am I supposed to do? Donovan would have thrown it to me more often earlier in the game so that I was already in a rhythm. A good quarterback knows that.
M: Terrell, why are you wearing an astronaut helmet and nothing else?
T.O.: (Doing crunches) I don't know what you're talking about, man.
The Maestro held onto the top spot for another week, even though his slim lead got even slimmer. Consistency was the key as Tom Brady (37.30), Larry Fitzgerald (24.80) and Jason Witten (23.15) made up for the first bad game of the season for Randy Moss (5.30) and the vacation day taken by Joseph Addai. Maurice Jones-Drew (16.05) had his first big game of the season, in spite of Jack Del Rio. Watching the Jags and Chiefs on Sunday, it was hard to figure out Jack of the River. MJD rushed for nearly 100 yards on less than 10 carries, and broke a couple of screen passes for nice gains, but seemed to only play on 3rd down. Fred Taylor is a nice back, but shouldn't be getting 75% of the carries when other teams can barely tackle the little bowling ball. It would seem that MJD would be the feature back because 5 or 6 yards per carry is better than 4, and having a back that can catch the ball is nice when none of the receivers can (if you can really blame them when David Garrard is the one throwing the ball).
Nearly posting an octuple double were the Kellogg Krushers. Charles Johnson (1.15) was the only one to miss double figures on a team that was led by one of our greatest Americans, Brett Favre (34.94). Joining him north of ten points were Ronnie Brown (21.65), New England's defense (18.00), Dallas Clark (15.45), Reggie Bush (14.95), Steve Smith (12.65), and Nate Kaeding (12.00). Brown has been resurgent lately, posting his third straight big game. That's not easy to do playing for the Fish. It will be even tougher now that Trent Green is out with a concussion and Cleo Lemon will be taking the snaps. Green isn't exactly a dangerous gunslinger, but has enough of a reputation to make teams respect the pass a little. Lemon has the reputation of being crummy, meaning opposing defenses will be putting 10 guys in the box to stop Brown. If Miami's offensive coordinator is like a lot of others in the NFL this year (cough, Niners, cough), he will still try to run the ball all the time while throwing screens and 3-yard outs, then wonder why the team isn't scoring any points.
Heading the second tier of teams in the PPFFL are The Dragons. If not for a savvy move (forced by a bye for Philadelphia) to Phillip Rivers (33.75) at QB, this may have been a really bad week. As it was, Rivers, along with the Bears defense (12.00) and about a third of what we saw from LaDainian Tomlinson (10.00) last season were enough to keep a tenuous hold on third place. Frank Gore (6.75), Marques Colston (5.55) and our buddy T.O. (3.25) were only slightly better than the trio The Bouncers started that all ended up sitting out their games. On the bright side, Jason Elam (3.00) kept the broncos from being shut out at home by San Diego, although, if you had the Broncos and 37 points, you lost.
Riding the right arm of Peyton Manning (39.96) and a bunch of guys who were held out of their games were The Bouncers. It might behoove them to have their organizational meetings prior to Thursday of every week so that they can have more time to come up with alternatives to guys who might be sketchy at to whether they will be playing. Just a couple of extra points, added to what Marshawn Lynch (6.90), Jeremy Shockey (9.65), the Ravens defense (9.00), and Mason Crosby (8.00) did would have vaulted these guys into the top half of the standings. It's a new franchise, so it is understandable that there will be a learning curve. At least they aren't in the bottom third of the league, where we find...
...The Outlaws, who had the best week of the bottom four and pulled themselves out of the basement. It's nice to be able to say that after all of the roster shuffling last week. Tony Romo (28.03) was somehow able to have a respectable fantasy night when it appeared he was going to surpass Rex Grossman's Monday Night debacle last season. The Giants defense (14.00) was a nice addition to the squad, as was Lavernaeus Coles (12.45). Heath Miller (12.20) and Willie Parker (8.10) did fairly well as the Steelers hammered one of the three totally inept offenses that call the NFC West home. There is no division in the National Football League that has more unimaginative, inept offensive coordinators than the NFC West. The Seahawks, Niners, and Rams all seem to have decent offensive talent, but none of them can get out of their own way on offense. Only the Cardinals have managed to put points on the board consistently, possibly because they have a coach with the sack to yank Leinart and play a guy with the arm to get the ball to their talented receivers. Maybe the rest of the teams should take some notes, not on yanking their QB, but on actually throwing the ball to the wide receivers. Oh, and not running the ball into the middle of the line on every 3rd-and-8.
Bringing up the rear, in very unfamiliar territory, is The Dominator. Being nearly 180 points out of first place is nothing to panic about after only 5 weeks, but getting behind by that much in only 5 weeks should at least raise some eyebrows. This team has had major problems at QB for most of the season, and wasn't looking too good after Derek Anderson's (23.59) 1st half in New England. Fortunately, Anderson bounced back with an Eli in the 2nd half and threw a couple of meaningless TDs while running up some nice yardage while his team was being blown out. Antonio Gates (21.65) had a nice game in the thin Rocky Mountain air, but that's where the good news ends. Neil Rackers (11.00) and the Jacksonville defense (9.00) were 3rd and 4th in points for this team, which is bad news. Kickers and defenses should not be relied upon for scoring, what they contribute is usually just icing on the cake. Icing that could be the greatest in the world still wouldn't change the crummy taste of the cake if it is made up of Edgerrin James (5.85), Clinton Portis (4.55), and Deion Branch (2.70). Maybe The Dominator needs Portis to take the rest of the squad to a back country dog fight somewhere to release the tension, build some team cameraderie, and get these guys back to playing at the high level we saw in Weeks 1 and 2.
Notes:
- The Dominator has first crack at available free agents this week, followed by The Outlaws, The Bouncers, The Dragons, the Kellogg Krushers, and The Maestro.
- Tony Kornheiser's stay on Monday Night Football looks to be a short one. Last night's game was as exciting and bizarre as one can get, and Tony had absolutely nothing good to offer. While Tirico and Jaws were calling and breaking down the action on the field, Tony was stuck trying to throw out silly puns, none of which were remotely funny. It's probably time MNF dumped the idea of having a "fan's" perspective in the booth. It didn't work with Dennis Miller and doesn't seem to be working with Kornheiser.
That's it for this week. Be good and don't do anything I wouldn't do.
The Commish
posted by Patrick Zalasky at 9:52 AM
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