Tuesday Review v2.15
Apologies to everyone for writing this 24 hours later than usual. For some reason, work has become an inconvenience when it comes to writing about this fake football league. Don't the people at KVIE realize that there are people who are looking forward to the information contained in these weekly summaries? A little more compassion and understanding isn't something you should have to ask for from a station that airs Sesame Street and Nova.
In regards to Week 15 in the PPFFL, Mother Nature was the big story. Teams that played in domes definitely had the best stats, as a Noreaster foiled New England in their attempt to score 100 points against the Jets and the Bills and Browns played in about 25 feet of blowing snow. The race for 4th place in this here league basically came to an end, as The Bouncers opened up their cushion to over 70 points on The Outlaws, so that leaves only the race for 2nd between the Kellogg Krushers and The Dragons to keep us interested over the last two weeks of the season.
At the top of the league, The Maestro officially set the single season scoring record this week, surpassing the total of 1,952.94 that the Cyhawks posted last season.
Official Standings (Week 15):
The Maestro 1,972.69 (84.30)
Kellogg Krushers 1,688.52 (107.54)
The Dragons 1,650.63 (101.26)
The Bouncers 1,551.36 (84.47)
The Outlaws 1,480.20 (63.13)
The Dominator 1,335.55 (59.79)
Week 15's "I Sure Wish I Would Have Played That Guy Award" is presented to The Maestro, by way of Mother Nature. Our leader trotted Tom Brady (8.75) out there for the game against the Jets...a game where many thought he would be allowed to throw for 10 or 11 TDs. Instead, winds whipped and snow fell, keeping the New England offense in check. Meanwhile, in the warm confines of the Superdome, Brady's season long backup, Drew Brees (45.20), was lighting the place up, much to the delight of the hundreds of fans that took time out of their day to watch the Saints play.
The Maestro's record setting week was rather pedestrian when compared to everything his team did after Week 1. In addition to Brady, Randy Moss (8.95) found it tough to do much in the cold and wind. Thankfully, Adrian Peterson (17.75) turned it on in the 2nd half against the Bears on the night Roone Arledge decided that an eternity in Hell was better than watching Tarvaris Jackson and Kyle Orton play on Monday Night Football. Jason Witten (16.65) is back to being Tony Romo's favorite target. That, of course, means that the inevitable meltdown from T.O. could only be days away, particularly if Romo has another crappy game that doesn't include hitting Mr. Me in the end zone a couple of times. The Cowboys are really becoming an interesting team as we near the end of the season. Not only are they in a dogfight for home field advantage throughout the NFC playoffs, Romo went in the tank as soon as Jessica Simpson popped up again, and T.O. has to be nearing the breaking point after his last couple of games. Stay tuned....
Adding a little to the distance between them and their closest pursuer were the Kellogg Krushers. The best score in the PPFFL last week made them a little more likely to follow up their championship in the inaugural season with a runner-up finish in this one. Most of their production came from the Edward Jones Dome, as Brett Favre (25.89) and Steven Jackson (21.50) played in one of the few games that wasn't adversely affected by the weather. In conditions tailor made for defensive success and against a brutal offense, the New England defense (21.00) was awesome again after a couple of weeks where they looked very vulnerable. Rob Bironas (15.00) was busy for the Titans, which is understandable when you look at the development of Tennessee QB Vince Young. When teams spy him and make him throw the ball accurately, the results aren't very pretty. His athleticism will get yardage in the middle of the field, but the red zone is a different story. When the running gets tougher and the DBs have a smaller area to defend, the passes need to be pinpoint and Captain Wonderlic is about as acucrate as Mark Wohlers, circa 1999.
Still in the running for the runner-up spot in 2007 are The Dragons. A return to MVP caliber performances from LaDainian Tomlinson (23.15) is a big reason this team has rallied over the 2nd half of the season. It's as if Norv Turner finally realized that he had the best running back in the league and a QB who might have to sit behind Kyle Boller if he were in Baltimore. Speaking of QBs, the weekly carousel for this team showcased Kurt Warner (32.16) and God's new favorite guy was the highest scoring PPFFL chucker for the week. Brian Westbrook (16.65) was his usual steady self and pulled off what many analysts called the smartest play they have ever seen. If you missed it you probably aren't reading this, so I won't rehash it. More important is the mental state of T.O. (3.85) after the last 2 games where Jason Witten was the most productive Dallas receiver. That's okay if it happens once, and T.O. will let it slide if it happens twice, but it is highly likely it won't be tolerated if it happens a third week in a row. Should the Cowboys' game plan not revolve around #81 the fireworks could go off in and out of the locker room, regardless of whether the team wins or not. Let's face it, we all want to see T.O. do something crazy, and there's no better time than right before the playoffs.
Pretty much locked into 4th place in their first season of PPFFL football are The Bouncers. It wasn't a great week for them, but it was much better than that of their closest rival and all but locked up their positioning in the final standings. Peyton Manning (23.17) was good enough in Oakland to avoid losing to the Raiders. Mason Crosby (19.00) and Greg Jennings (13.30) took advantage of playing indoors. The Bears defense (11.00), meanwhile, took advantage of their opportunity to play against Tarvaris Jackson. If Vince Young can be compared to Mark Wohlers, then Jackson is Rick Ankiel in the 2000 playoffs. Sure, he threw some nice passes to his receivers that got open, but he also threw some balls where the closest person wearing purple was one of the Viqueens. The season isn't over yet, but it still seems appropriate to give some love to this rookie team for being relevant for most of the season and managing to stay out of the basement by a couple hundred points. Raise your hand if you expected a ton of success from them when they drafted Lorenzo Neal, the man who has carried the ball 13 times all season and is the designated blocker for LDT. That's what I thought.
Destined to finish next-to-last for the second consecutive season are The Outlaws. This season was nothing like last, though, as the team was much more competitive than it was a year ago. Last season saw The Spongebobs spending most of their time in the cellar. This year they stayed out of last for most of the season and even threatened some teams in front of them. In Week 15, where some big numbers could have pushed them into 4th place, only Brandon Marshall (19.35), Willie Parker (10.45), and Torry Holt (10.05) were able to crack double figures. The biggest disappointment was obviously Tony Romo (0.58), who had the worst week this season for a QB who played the whole game and didn't have to leave early due to injury. To put it into perspective, Romo tallied fewer points last week than Eli Manning, who threw 34! incompletions. As you all know, Romo's stinkbomb wasn't just a coincidence. Jessica Simpson turned up again last week and obviously caused the easily distracted Romo to have his head somewhere other than inside his helmet. The only positive for the fans in Dallas is that Ms. Simpson in unlikely to trek to Green Bay for a game in January, should Romo help piss away the home field advantage. With her somewhere else and some cold air to keep his head clear, Romo might have a better chance to win a big game there than he would if he were playing at home with his silicone filled beauty watching from a luxury box.
Last, but not least, we once again come to The Dominator. Give the guy some credit, he's showing some incredible dexterity for someone that has held up the whole league for most of the season. Another crummy week was guaranteed for him when Mother Nature decided to take out some frustration on Cleveland Sunday afternoon. Derek Anderson (4.24), Braylon Edwards (7.20), and Kellen Winslow (3.40) were fortunate just to get out of there without being swallowed up in an avalanche. To score the first 8-0 victory in professional football since 1929 was just icing on the cake. Or, cherry syrup on the snow-cone, if you prefer. Had it not been for Clinton Portis (15.30) this would have been the first octuple single in PPFFL history. Portis had a stellar game against a Giants team that is somehow in the playoff hunt with Eli at QB and a defense that appears to be playing a couple of men down sometimes. They've only faced what could be considered a quality QB 3 times this season (Favre once and Romo twice - sorry, Dunnavunn McNabb doesn't fit into that category anymore) and they got hammered in each game. They also gave up 41 points to the Tarvaris Jackson led Vikings, but that was the day Eli threw 3 TDs to the guys in the purple helmets, so Jackson's impact on that game was zero.
Notes:
Apologies to everyone for writing this 24 hours later than usual. For some reason, work has become an inconvenience when it comes to writing about this fake football league. Don't the people at KVIE realize that there are people who are looking forward to the information contained in these weekly summaries? A little more compassion and understanding isn't something you should have to ask for from a station that airs Sesame Street and Nova.
In regards to Week 15 in the PPFFL, Mother Nature was the big story. Teams that played in domes definitely had the best stats, as a Noreaster foiled New England in their attempt to score 100 points against the Jets and the Bills and Browns played in about 25 feet of blowing snow. The race for 4th place in this here league basically came to an end, as The Bouncers opened up their cushion to over 70 points on The Outlaws, so that leaves only the race for 2nd between the Kellogg Krushers and The Dragons to keep us interested over the last two weeks of the season.
At the top of the league, The Maestro officially set the single season scoring record this week, surpassing the total of 1,952.94 that the Cyhawks posted last season.
Official Standings (Week 15):
The Maestro 1,972.69 (84.30)
Kellogg Krushers 1,688.52 (107.54)
The Dragons 1,650.63 (101.26)
The Bouncers 1,551.36 (84.47)
The Outlaws 1,480.20 (63.13)
The Dominator 1,335.55 (59.79)
Week 15's "I Sure Wish I Would Have Played That Guy Award" is presented to The Maestro, by way of Mother Nature. Our leader trotted Tom Brady (8.75) out there for the game against the Jets...a game where many thought he would be allowed to throw for 10 or 11 TDs. Instead, winds whipped and snow fell, keeping the New England offense in check. Meanwhile, in the warm confines of the Superdome, Brady's season long backup, Drew Brees (45.20), was lighting the place up, much to the delight of the hundreds of fans that took time out of their day to watch the Saints play.
The Maestro's record setting week was rather pedestrian when compared to everything his team did after Week 1. In addition to Brady, Randy Moss (8.95) found it tough to do much in the cold and wind. Thankfully, Adrian Peterson (17.75) turned it on in the 2nd half against the Bears on the night Roone Arledge decided that an eternity in Hell was better than watching Tarvaris Jackson and Kyle Orton play on Monday Night Football. Jason Witten (16.65) is back to being Tony Romo's favorite target. That, of course, means that the inevitable meltdown from T.O. could only be days away, particularly if Romo has another crappy game that doesn't include hitting Mr. Me in the end zone a couple of times. The Cowboys are really becoming an interesting team as we near the end of the season. Not only are they in a dogfight for home field advantage throughout the NFC playoffs, Romo went in the tank as soon as Jessica Simpson popped up again, and T.O. has to be nearing the breaking point after his last couple of games. Stay tuned....
Adding a little to the distance between them and their closest pursuer were the Kellogg Krushers. The best score in the PPFFL last week made them a little more likely to follow up their championship in the inaugural season with a runner-up finish in this one. Most of their production came from the Edward Jones Dome, as Brett Favre (25.89) and Steven Jackson (21.50) played in one of the few games that wasn't adversely affected by the weather. In conditions tailor made for defensive success and against a brutal offense, the New England defense (21.00) was awesome again after a couple of weeks where they looked very vulnerable. Rob Bironas (15.00) was busy for the Titans, which is understandable when you look at the development of Tennessee QB Vince Young. When teams spy him and make him throw the ball accurately, the results aren't very pretty. His athleticism will get yardage in the middle of the field, but the red zone is a different story. When the running gets tougher and the DBs have a smaller area to defend, the passes need to be pinpoint and Captain Wonderlic is about as acucrate as Mark Wohlers, circa 1999.
Still in the running for the runner-up spot in 2007 are The Dragons. A return to MVP caliber performances from LaDainian Tomlinson (23.15) is a big reason this team has rallied over the 2nd half of the season. It's as if Norv Turner finally realized that he had the best running back in the league and a QB who might have to sit behind Kyle Boller if he were in Baltimore. Speaking of QBs, the weekly carousel for this team showcased Kurt Warner (32.16) and God's new favorite guy was the highest scoring PPFFL chucker for the week. Brian Westbrook (16.65) was his usual steady self and pulled off what many analysts called the smartest play they have ever seen. If you missed it you probably aren't reading this, so I won't rehash it. More important is the mental state of T.O. (3.85) after the last 2 games where Jason Witten was the most productive Dallas receiver. That's okay if it happens once, and T.O. will let it slide if it happens twice, but it is highly likely it won't be tolerated if it happens a third week in a row. Should the Cowboys' game plan not revolve around #81 the fireworks could go off in and out of the locker room, regardless of whether the team wins or not. Let's face it, we all want to see T.O. do something crazy, and there's no better time than right before the playoffs.
Pretty much locked into 4th place in their first season of PPFFL football are The Bouncers. It wasn't a great week for them, but it was much better than that of their closest rival and all but locked up their positioning in the final standings. Peyton Manning (23.17) was good enough in Oakland to avoid losing to the Raiders. Mason Crosby (19.00) and Greg Jennings (13.30) took advantage of playing indoors. The Bears defense (11.00), meanwhile, took advantage of their opportunity to play against Tarvaris Jackson. If Vince Young can be compared to Mark Wohlers, then Jackson is Rick Ankiel in the 2000 playoffs. Sure, he threw some nice passes to his receivers that got open, but he also threw some balls where the closest person wearing purple was one of the Viqueens. The season isn't over yet, but it still seems appropriate to give some love to this rookie team for being relevant for most of the season and managing to stay out of the basement by a couple hundred points. Raise your hand if you expected a ton of success from them when they drafted Lorenzo Neal, the man who has carried the ball 13 times all season and is the designated blocker for LDT. That's what I thought.
Destined to finish next-to-last for the second consecutive season are The Outlaws. This season was nothing like last, though, as the team was much more competitive than it was a year ago. Last season saw The Spongebobs spending most of their time in the cellar. This year they stayed out of last for most of the season and even threatened some teams in front of them. In Week 15, where some big numbers could have pushed them into 4th place, only Brandon Marshall (19.35), Willie Parker (10.45), and Torry Holt (10.05) were able to crack double figures. The biggest disappointment was obviously Tony Romo (0.58), who had the worst week this season for a QB who played the whole game and didn't have to leave early due to injury. To put it into perspective, Romo tallied fewer points last week than Eli Manning, who threw 34! incompletions. As you all know, Romo's stinkbomb wasn't just a coincidence. Jessica Simpson turned up again last week and obviously caused the easily distracted Romo to have his head somewhere other than inside his helmet. The only positive for the fans in Dallas is that Ms. Simpson in unlikely to trek to Green Bay for a game in January, should Romo help piss away the home field advantage. With her somewhere else and some cold air to keep his head clear, Romo might have a better chance to win a big game there than he would if he were playing at home with his silicone filled beauty watching from a luxury box.
Last, but not least, we once again come to The Dominator. Give the guy some credit, he's showing some incredible dexterity for someone that has held up the whole league for most of the season. Another crummy week was guaranteed for him when Mother Nature decided to take out some frustration on Cleveland Sunday afternoon. Derek Anderson (4.24), Braylon Edwards (7.20), and Kellen Winslow (3.40) were fortunate just to get out of there without being swallowed up in an avalanche. To score the first 8-0 victory in professional football since 1929 was just icing on the cake. Or, cherry syrup on the snow-cone, if you prefer. Had it not been for Clinton Portis (15.30) this would have been the first octuple single in PPFFL history. Portis had a stellar game against a Giants team that is somehow in the playoff hunt with Eli at QB and a defense that appears to be playing a couple of men down sometimes. They've only faced what could be considered a quality QB 3 times this season (Favre once and Romo twice - sorry, Dunnavunn McNabb doesn't fit into that category anymore) and they got hammered in each game. They also gave up 41 points to the Tarvaris Jackson led Vikings, but that was the day Eli threw 3 TDs to the guys in the purple helmets, so Jackson's impact on that game was zero.
Notes:
- The order of transactions will remain the same for the rest of the season, unless something spectacular happens in the race between The Dragons and the Kellogg Krushers.
- Oakland had the chance to realize a goal for The Maestro at the end of the 1st half against the Colts. Indianapolis punted to around the Raider's 35 yard line, with only a few seconds left. A fair catch would have given SeaBass a shot at nailing a 75 yard free kick. Much to our leader's chagrin, the Polish Cannon stayed on the sideline as the Silver and Black simply ran out the clock and went to the locker room.
- A lot of people who follow the NFL like to rip on the low quality of QBs playing right now. A perfect example for their argument is the craptacular game from Monday night. The criticism seems a little unfair, though. There are many top notch signal callers in the game today, from Manning (Peyton, in case you were wondering) to Brady to guys like Brees and Romo, with guys like Dunnavunn, Derek Anderson, Matt Hasselbeck, and Kurt Warner that have either done well in the past or are having a solid 2007. If you look at any era in the NFL, you're going to find your crummy guys, so this year isn't any different than it has been in the past. It's likely more noticeable now because teams build their offenses around the passing game. Twenty years ago, Eli Manning would have been handing off much more than he would have been dropping back to pass. Nowadays, with teams throwing more than half of the time (and sometimes as high as 70-75% of the time) the stiffs like Cleo Lemon, Kyle Orton, and Alex Smith are front and center.
That's it for this week. As usual, and esecially in this most special time of the year, do great things, gentlemen.
The Commish
posted by Patrick Zalasky at 10:43 AM
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