Tuesday Review v3.10
I know, it's not Tuesday. I could tell you that the Week 10 review wasn't posted yesterday in honor of Veteran's Day, but that's not the case. The real reason is this: Jack and Alex came to work because of the school holiday and, instead of screwing around to kill some time, we all actually worked (or, at least we did until two of us packed it in after lunch). On the way home from work, we stopped at the Watt Avenue access to the American River. While there, we chucked a few rocks before finding a tennis ball. We threw it into the water a couple of times, then lanunched big rocks at it in an attempt to get it back to the shore. The ball eventually ended up in a placid inlet where it probably moved about an inch since yesterday afternoon.
After that, we got slurpees and went to Rau Park to blast some soccer balls around. We went home, fed the dogs, and decided we needed to play a little more soccer. We did that until it got dark, came home, made dinner, ate, and settled in to watch the Kings play the Pistons. In case you missed it, the game wasn't exactly the crowning event of Brad Miller's career. Once the game was over, there wasn't exactly overwhelming motivation to write this summary. So, that's how we got here.
As for the PPFFL, The Dragons made up some ground on our leaders; The Dominator made a huge move and is threatening to make a run at the top of the league; and The Outlaws are trying to make a run at the two teams that won the first two PPFFL championships.
Official Standings (Week 10):
Cyclones 1,102.66 (94.34)
The Dragons 1,084.35 (118.21)
Gnomies 1,030.81 (91.59)
The Dominator 1,013.15 (141.14)
The Maestro 969.00 (92.89)
Team STY 954.75 (98.18)
The Outlaws 880.68 (110.99)
This week's "I Sure Wish I Would Have Played That Guy" Award goes to The Maestro. Last season's champ must have gotten spoiled penciling Tom Brady into the lineup week after week and lost all sense of reality when it came to choosing a QB. This week's choice was Shaun Hill (19.44)...of the 49ers. It really makes no difference who the other choice at QB was. When someone plays a Niner QB, there is obviously a better choice somewhere. And for those of you who look at Hill's stats and think, "He wasn't really that bad", consider this: He threw about 5 interceptions that were wiped out by penalties against Arizona. His performance on Monday night was very Grossman-esque.
Seeing their comfortable lead shrink hasn't seemed to affect the Cyclones much. They're still upbeat, even though Drew Brees (35.44), Larry Fitzgerald (16.45), and the Baltimore defense (16.00) were the only ones to produce last weekend. Off weeks are bound to happen, but the kids have to be hoping they don't become a regular occurence. They need guys like Calvin Johnson (6.60), Chris Johnson (3.15), and LaDainian Tomlinson (9.85) to step up, or else they might get run down by....
...The Dragons. These guys keep riding the right arm of Kurt Warner (54.56), who, in all reality, probably did a little worse than we all expected him to do against the Niners. It's a good things he cracked half a hundred, because the only other real production came from Kellen Winslow, Jr. (28.55). Wait a second, let me read back over that. Yep, Kellen Winslow, Jr. actually caught some passes and scored a couple of TDs. And, we all thought he and Jeremy Shockey had a deal to overhype themselves while never doing anything productive on the field and complaining about everyone and everything off of it.
Still in 3rd place, at least for now, are the Gnomies. They had great games from running backs Adrian Peterson (23.25) and Thomas Jones (28.45), and not much from anyone else. Greg Jennings (4.85), Jerricho Cotchery (1.90) and Donald Lee (1.30) put up numbers that would embarrass Antwaan Randle-El. Brett Favre, meanwhile, was hampered by the ineptitude of the Rams. Leading them 40-0 at halftime, the Jets did the honorable thing and stopped throwing the ball completely in the 2nd half, while removing the majority of their starters one series into the 3rd quarter.
The big mover of the week was The Dominator. Jay Cutler (44.39) was back to his early season self, while Anquan Boldin (24.55) looks to have fully reovered from his horriffic facial injury. Tony Gonzalez (30.65), meanwhile, put up huge numbers in a game where he was obviously the main focus of the Chiefs' game plan. As in, Tyler Thigpen's game plan read, "Gonzalez is the only NFL caliber receiver we have on the roster. Throw it to him as much as possible and ignore stiffs like Dwayne Bowe, Mark Bradley, and Will Franklin. Oh, and we have absolutely no running game. Good luck!"
Things looked pretty good for The Maestro in the early action on Sunday. Maurice Jones-Drew (25.70), Wes Welker (19.20), and Ronnie Brown (13.30) all did well in the morning games. The afternoon games, however, featured too much Smith, as in Steve (1.45) and L.J. (4.80). Let's give it up to L.J., though. Not only did he play, he actually did something that could be measured statistically. It's been quite some time since we've been able to say that.
The official PPFFL team in turmoil right now is Team STY. Utilizing way more waiver transactions than in past seasons is not what they had in mind. While Tony Romo is nursing his broken pinky with mai tais and TLC from J-Simp, this team is picking up guys like Leon Washington (11.00) and Dunnavunn McNabb (29.13). The waiver guys played well last week, but that obviously hasn't been the case all season. And, let's officially add Plax Burress (7.85) to the Me-First Receivers Club of Underachieving Malcontents. He becomes the third official member, joining T.O. and Randy Moss.
Making overtures of getting out of the cellar are The Outlaws. As has been pointed out before, no matter how far back these guys get, they always make a late season move up the standings. They're still a ways from passing someone, but they're starting to get a little frisky. Eddie Royal (26.90), Brandon Jacobs (19.30), Matt Forte (19.30), and Brandon Marshall (16.45) all performed well, offsetting the struggles had by Aaron Rodgers (12.39). These guys won't be winning the PPFFL championship, but they look like they're going to make a run at putting one of our past champions into the cellar.
Notes:
I know, it's not Tuesday. I could tell you that the Week 10 review wasn't posted yesterday in honor of Veteran's Day, but that's not the case. The real reason is this: Jack and Alex came to work because of the school holiday and, instead of screwing around to kill some time, we all actually worked (or, at least we did until two of us packed it in after lunch). On the way home from work, we stopped at the Watt Avenue access to the American River. While there, we chucked a few rocks before finding a tennis ball. We threw it into the water a couple of times, then lanunched big rocks at it in an attempt to get it back to the shore. The ball eventually ended up in a placid inlet where it probably moved about an inch since yesterday afternoon.
After that, we got slurpees and went to Rau Park to blast some soccer balls around. We went home, fed the dogs, and decided we needed to play a little more soccer. We did that until it got dark, came home, made dinner, ate, and settled in to watch the Kings play the Pistons. In case you missed it, the game wasn't exactly the crowning event of Brad Miller's career. Once the game was over, there wasn't exactly overwhelming motivation to write this summary. So, that's how we got here.
As for the PPFFL, The Dragons made up some ground on our leaders; The Dominator made a huge move and is threatening to make a run at the top of the league; and The Outlaws are trying to make a run at the two teams that won the first two PPFFL championships.
Official Standings (Week 10):
Cyclones 1,102.66 (94.34)
The Dragons 1,084.35 (118.21)
Gnomies 1,030.81 (91.59)
The Dominator 1,013.15 (141.14)
The Maestro 969.00 (92.89)
Team STY 954.75 (98.18)
The Outlaws 880.68 (110.99)
This week's "I Sure Wish I Would Have Played That Guy" Award goes to The Maestro. Last season's champ must have gotten spoiled penciling Tom Brady into the lineup week after week and lost all sense of reality when it came to choosing a QB. This week's choice was Shaun Hill (19.44)...of the 49ers. It really makes no difference who the other choice at QB was. When someone plays a Niner QB, there is obviously a better choice somewhere. And for those of you who look at Hill's stats and think, "He wasn't really that bad", consider this: He threw about 5 interceptions that were wiped out by penalties against Arizona. His performance on Monday night was very Grossman-esque.
Seeing their comfortable lead shrink hasn't seemed to affect the Cyclones much. They're still upbeat, even though Drew Brees (35.44), Larry Fitzgerald (16.45), and the Baltimore defense (16.00) were the only ones to produce last weekend. Off weeks are bound to happen, but the kids have to be hoping they don't become a regular occurence. They need guys like Calvin Johnson (6.60), Chris Johnson (3.15), and LaDainian Tomlinson (9.85) to step up, or else they might get run down by....
...The Dragons. These guys keep riding the right arm of Kurt Warner (54.56), who, in all reality, probably did a little worse than we all expected him to do against the Niners. It's a good things he cracked half a hundred, because the only other real production came from Kellen Winslow, Jr. (28.55). Wait a second, let me read back over that. Yep, Kellen Winslow, Jr. actually caught some passes and scored a couple of TDs. And, we all thought he and Jeremy Shockey had a deal to overhype themselves while never doing anything productive on the field and complaining about everyone and everything off of it.
Still in 3rd place, at least for now, are the Gnomies. They had great games from running backs Adrian Peterson (23.25) and Thomas Jones (28.45), and not much from anyone else. Greg Jennings (4.85), Jerricho Cotchery (1.90) and Donald Lee (1.30) put up numbers that would embarrass Antwaan Randle-El. Brett Favre, meanwhile, was hampered by the ineptitude of the Rams. Leading them 40-0 at halftime, the Jets did the honorable thing and stopped throwing the ball completely in the 2nd half, while removing the majority of their starters one series into the 3rd quarter.
The big mover of the week was The Dominator. Jay Cutler (44.39) was back to his early season self, while Anquan Boldin (24.55) looks to have fully reovered from his horriffic facial injury. Tony Gonzalez (30.65), meanwhile, put up huge numbers in a game where he was obviously the main focus of the Chiefs' game plan. As in, Tyler Thigpen's game plan read, "Gonzalez is the only NFL caliber receiver we have on the roster. Throw it to him as much as possible and ignore stiffs like Dwayne Bowe, Mark Bradley, and Will Franklin. Oh, and we have absolutely no running game. Good luck!"
Things looked pretty good for The Maestro in the early action on Sunday. Maurice Jones-Drew (25.70), Wes Welker (19.20), and Ronnie Brown (13.30) all did well in the morning games. The afternoon games, however, featured too much Smith, as in Steve (1.45) and L.J. (4.80). Let's give it up to L.J., though. Not only did he play, he actually did something that could be measured statistically. It's been quite some time since we've been able to say that.
The official PPFFL team in turmoil right now is Team STY. Utilizing way more waiver transactions than in past seasons is not what they had in mind. While Tony Romo is nursing his broken pinky with mai tais and TLC from J-Simp, this team is picking up guys like Leon Washington (11.00) and Dunnavunn McNabb (29.13). The waiver guys played well last week, but that obviously hasn't been the case all season. And, let's officially add Plax Burress (7.85) to the Me-First Receivers Club of Underachieving Malcontents. He becomes the third official member, joining T.O. and Randy Moss.
Making overtures of getting out of the cellar are The Outlaws. As has been pointed out before, no matter how far back these guys get, they always make a late season move up the standings. They're still a ways from passing someone, but they're starting to get a little frisky. Eddie Royal (26.90), Brandon Jacobs (19.30), Matt Forte (19.30), and Brandon Marshall (16.45) all performed well, offsetting the struggles had by Aaron Rodgers (12.39). These guys won't be winning the PPFFL championship, but they look like they're going to make a run at putting one of our past champions into the cellar.
Notes:
- Mike Ham, I mean Lamb, is a certified buffoon. While Peaches was ripping on Mike Martz for his ineptitude during the final drive of the game Monday Night, Lamb's "devil's advocate" position was more idiotic than usual. When Peaches hammered Martz for not ordering a spike of the ball to kill the clock after the official's review, Ham says, "Yeah, but then what do you do? I mean, you have the guys out there, go ahead and run the play." Ahem, excuse me no-neck, but didn't you play football for a long time? How about killing the clock, finding out exactly where the ball is spotted, then calling and running a play that is actually organized? That's just what a casual observer would do. I'm sure, though, that the expert analysis and opinion that Ham gives between bites on turkey legs is better than anything I could come up with.
- I just read where the Raiders on Sunday faced the following 4th down distances: 11, 13, 17, 19, 22, and 23. If legs had rotator cuffs, Shane Lechler would be getting his surgically repaired at the end of this season.
- If Ron Jaworski had his way, I think he'd have Bill Bergey come into the Monday Night Football booth specifically to punch Tony Kornheiser in the face.
- Stu Scott made a comment on the MNF pregame show that their crew was facing a bit of a conflict of interest with Steve Young commenting on the team that made him a hall of famer. Either Stu forgot that Emmitt Smith finished his career with the Cardinals, or he agrees with everyone else that Emmitt's time in the desert wasn't what made him a hall of famer.
- The Pillow Fight of the Week was unquestionable Panthers 17, Raiders 6. When the winning team's QB has a rating of about -12 and the losing team puts all of their equipment away before the end of the game (SeaBass said that all of the practice balls had been put away and the net had been taken down when he went to warm up before his 58 yard attempt at the end of the game), you have yourselves a slap fight of enormous proportions.
- For Week 11, the PFOTW is Rams/Niners. Need anyone say more?
That's it for this week. Sorry for the abbreviated format, but I had to get it done before the Gumbelievable matchup of Jets/Patriots hits the airwaves tomorrow night.
Get those Week 11 lineups in and don't take any wooden nickels.
The Commish
posted by Patrick Zalasky at 10:33 AM
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