Tuesday Review v2.6
It was a relatively normal week, with the exception of one team, as five teams scored between 85.71 and 120.95 points...and one team scored 181.71. The Maestro came within 8 points of the single week PPFFL scoring record, making the second time this season that he has put up the second best week of the short PPFFL history. That huge performance pushed The Maestro's lead to nearly a C-note over the second place Kellogg Krushers, and to about 260 points over the last place Outlaws, making it very difficult for the teams at the rear to make up enough ground to have any hope of finishing at the top after Week 17. There is still a lot of time left, though, and things can change quickly, as we saw last year, so nothing is out of the question.
Current Standings (Week 6):
The Maestro 832.02 (181.71)
Kellogg Krushers 733.75 (85.71)
The Dragons 640.96 (112.41)
The Bouncers 624.51 (97.43)
The Dominator 594.04 (120.95)
The Outlaws 571.08 (94.63)
The winner of this week's "I Sure Wish I Would Have Played That Guy" Award is the Kellogg Krushers, who started Vincent Jackson (1.25) while leaving Devin Hester (29.60) on the bench. Hester is a big weapon when he is returning kicks to the house, as he has done the last couple of weeks, but becomes even more valuable when the Bears play him at wide receiver and throw to him deep, as they did on Sunday. It's tough to go with Hester week to week, though, because not everyone will kick to him regularly, and he's not exactly looking to John Elway to throw to him when he's on offense. Honorable mention for the award this week goes to The Maestro, who would have had the first ever 200 point week had he played Tony Gonzalez (29.10) instead of Jason Witten (5.35).
Riding a wave reminiscent of the Cyhawks from a year ago, The Maestro has opened a sizeable lead at the 6/17th mark. Tom Brady (62.51) and Randy Moss (14.95) are two of the main reasons, as the Patriots appear to be running up the score on everyone in an attempt to exact revenge on those who had the nerve to negatively react to their blatant cheating. A byporduct of running up the score is plenty of action for the kicker, leading to Stephen Gostkowski (13.00) cracking double figures. If it weren't for Brady, The Maestro's running game would be the talk of the week, as Adrian Peterson (43.05) and Maurice Jones-Drew (32.00) both had over 200 all purpose yards and multiple TDs while touching the ball fewer than 25 times. Do you think the Taylors, Chet and Fred, see the writing on the wall and know that the young guys putting up the big stats should be getting most of the action in Minnesota and Jacksonville from here on out? Or, do you think they will act like most other guys by whining and complaining if and when their coaches come to their senses and exclusively feature the younger, better players?
Dropping off of the pace a little bit were the Kellogg Krushers, owning partly to the first bad week this season for America's QB, Brett Favre (10.16). Who could blame the guy, though? The price of oil skyrocketed to over $85 per barrel, putting strain on the US economy and making people wonder how they are going to afford to heat their homes this winter. When you're America's QB and play in a cold weather city, that's going to wear on you, no matter how well you prepared to face the 'Skins defense. On the bright side for the Kellogg Krushers, Steve Smith (26.60) and Ronnie Brown (20.50), who couldn't care less about how other people will afford to heat their homes, had very nice weeks. For Smith, that's no small feat, as he was catching balls from Vinny Testaverde who was signed by the Panthers last Wednesday and only practiced twice before the game on Sunday. Vinny has truly become the Jesse Orosco of the NFL.
Last year's PPFFL MVP returned to form this week against the Raiders, and The Dragons are really happy he did. LaDainian Tomlinson (40.70) gained nearly 200 yards on the gound and, more importantly, scored four times. The only negative, if there really can be one, is that he didn't throw any TD passes this week, showing that he really wasn't trying as hard as he did last season. Dunnavunn McNabb (25.21) and Brian Westbrook (16.80) put up pretty good numbers in a tough game against the Jets, and T.O. (15.30) got some stats as his team was having their manhood taken away by the Patriots. That's okay for T.O., though, because he had better stats than Patrick Crayton or Jason Witten, and that's all that matters. In T.O.'s mind, he won. The astronaut helmet will stay in his closet at least until Sunday.
The Bouncers had a weird week, as they got huge games from T.J. Houshmanzadeh (30.25) and the Baltimore defense (23.00), but were let down by Shaun Alexander (1.75) and Santana Moss (-2.00). Moss has officially passed Marc Bulger in the race to be named this year's PPFFL Most Worthless Player, wherein he would receive the Antwaan Randle El Trophy at the end of the season. Somewhere in between the great and the lame were Jeff Garcia (26.03), Jeremy Shockey (8.15) and Cedric Benson (6.25). Hats off to Garcia, who keeps on producing wherever he goes, and never complains if he is asked to take a lesser role than that of a #1 guy. He's the kind of team guy that everyone always raves about. The Bucs were projected to be abysmal, similar to the forecast the Eagles were given after McNabb was hurt last year, yet Garcia stepped in both times and has made the teams winners. Plus, Jon Gruden really likes him because he finally has a QB he can look directly in the eye without the use of a step ladder.
Bouncing back from a really bad week was The Dominator. Give his scouting department huge props for finding diamond in the rough Derek Anderson (44.05). The Browns are still bad, but at least they have an offense exciting enough to put points on the board and keep the fans mildly interested. Anderson's favorite target, Braylon Edwards (26.35) was a last minute pick up this week and helped carry a team that wasn't much more than average everywhere else. Chad Johnson* (12.15) was second banana again to Quatro Cinco, but Thomas Jones (11.05) was better than his brother Julius has been. Antonio Gates (5.90) had the rare off week, while Clinton Portis (5.45) was either distracted by the escalating tension between Turkey and the Kurds of northern Iraq, or he didn't watch enough film of the Green Bay defense. It was tough to tell. Maybe demoting Clinton to the pit crew of a USAR Hooters Pro Cup race team for a week or two is what Joe Gibbs needs to do to motivate his #1 back.
*Chad Johnson will no longer be referred to by his self-imposed nickname, Ocho Cinco. Once another player on your own team has surpassed your performance, you must go back to being referred to by your given name.
Sliding back into the basement this week are The Outlaws. It could only be expected when the running backs in the starting lineup combined for less than 1 point (Rudi Johnson 0.40, Michael Turner 0.40). It was the antithesis of the backfield started by The Maestro. Fortunately, Chris Cooley (23.25) and Donte Stallworth (22.80) had great games, while Tony Romo (26.43) did okay after a shaky start. The Giants defense (10.00) and Nick Folk (9.00) were solid for a defense and kicker, but Lavernaeus Coles (2.35) was abysmal, no matter what position he may have been trying to play. Coles' problem is obviously that he has the speed to get deep on anyone but plays with a QB that needs hurricane force winds behind him to get the ball more than 17 yards down the field.
Notes:
It was a relatively normal week, with the exception of one team, as five teams scored between 85.71 and 120.95 points...and one team scored 181.71. The Maestro came within 8 points of the single week PPFFL scoring record, making the second time this season that he has put up the second best week of the short PPFFL history. That huge performance pushed The Maestro's lead to nearly a C-note over the second place Kellogg Krushers, and to about 260 points over the last place Outlaws, making it very difficult for the teams at the rear to make up enough ground to have any hope of finishing at the top after Week 17. There is still a lot of time left, though, and things can change quickly, as we saw last year, so nothing is out of the question.
Current Standings (Week 6):
The Maestro 832.02 (181.71)
Kellogg Krushers 733.75 (85.71)
The Dragons 640.96 (112.41)
The Bouncers 624.51 (97.43)
The Dominator 594.04 (120.95)
The Outlaws 571.08 (94.63)
The winner of this week's "I Sure Wish I Would Have Played That Guy" Award is the Kellogg Krushers, who started Vincent Jackson (1.25) while leaving Devin Hester (29.60) on the bench. Hester is a big weapon when he is returning kicks to the house, as he has done the last couple of weeks, but becomes even more valuable when the Bears play him at wide receiver and throw to him deep, as they did on Sunday. It's tough to go with Hester week to week, though, because not everyone will kick to him regularly, and he's not exactly looking to John Elway to throw to him when he's on offense. Honorable mention for the award this week goes to The Maestro, who would have had the first ever 200 point week had he played Tony Gonzalez (29.10) instead of Jason Witten (5.35).
Riding a wave reminiscent of the Cyhawks from a year ago, The Maestro has opened a sizeable lead at the 6/17th mark. Tom Brady (62.51) and Randy Moss (14.95) are two of the main reasons, as the Patriots appear to be running up the score on everyone in an attempt to exact revenge on those who had the nerve to negatively react to their blatant cheating. A byporduct of running up the score is plenty of action for the kicker, leading to Stephen Gostkowski (13.00) cracking double figures. If it weren't for Brady, The Maestro's running game would be the talk of the week, as Adrian Peterson (43.05) and Maurice Jones-Drew (32.00) both had over 200 all purpose yards and multiple TDs while touching the ball fewer than 25 times. Do you think the Taylors, Chet and Fred, see the writing on the wall and know that the young guys putting up the big stats should be getting most of the action in Minnesota and Jacksonville from here on out? Or, do you think they will act like most other guys by whining and complaining if and when their coaches come to their senses and exclusively feature the younger, better players?
Dropping off of the pace a little bit were the Kellogg Krushers, owning partly to the first bad week this season for America's QB, Brett Favre (10.16). Who could blame the guy, though? The price of oil skyrocketed to over $85 per barrel, putting strain on the US economy and making people wonder how they are going to afford to heat their homes this winter. When you're America's QB and play in a cold weather city, that's going to wear on you, no matter how well you prepared to face the 'Skins defense. On the bright side for the Kellogg Krushers, Steve Smith (26.60) and Ronnie Brown (20.50), who couldn't care less about how other people will afford to heat their homes, had very nice weeks. For Smith, that's no small feat, as he was catching balls from Vinny Testaverde who was signed by the Panthers last Wednesday and only practiced twice before the game on Sunday. Vinny has truly become the Jesse Orosco of the NFL.
Last year's PPFFL MVP returned to form this week against the Raiders, and The Dragons are really happy he did. LaDainian Tomlinson (40.70) gained nearly 200 yards on the gound and, more importantly, scored four times. The only negative, if there really can be one, is that he didn't throw any TD passes this week, showing that he really wasn't trying as hard as he did last season. Dunnavunn McNabb (25.21) and Brian Westbrook (16.80) put up pretty good numbers in a tough game against the Jets, and T.O. (15.30) got some stats as his team was having their manhood taken away by the Patriots. That's okay for T.O., though, because he had better stats than Patrick Crayton or Jason Witten, and that's all that matters. In T.O.'s mind, he won. The astronaut helmet will stay in his closet at least until Sunday.
The Bouncers had a weird week, as they got huge games from T.J. Houshmanzadeh (30.25) and the Baltimore defense (23.00), but were let down by Shaun Alexander (1.75) and Santana Moss (-2.00). Moss has officially passed Marc Bulger in the race to be named this year's PPFFL Most Worthless Player, wherein he would receive the Antwaan Randle El Trophy at the end of the season. Somewhere in between the great and the lame were Jeff Garcia (26.03), Jeremy Shockey (8.15) and Cedric Benson (6.25). Hats off to Garcia, who keeps on producing wherever he goes, and never complains if he is asked to take a lesser role than that of a #1 guy. He's the kind of team guy that everyone always raves about. The Bucs were projected to be abysmal, similar to the forecast the Eagles were given after McNabb was hurt last year, yet Garcia stepped in both times and has made the teams winners. Plus, Jon Gruden really likes him because he finally has a QB he can look directly in the eye without the use of a step ladder.
Bouncing back from a really bad week was The Dominator. Give his scouting department huge props for finding diamond in the rough Derek Anderson (44.05). The Browns are still bad, but at least they have an offense exciting enough to put points on the board and keep the fans mildly interested. Anderson's favorite target, Braylon Edwards (26.35) was a last minute pick up this week and helped carry a team that wasn't much more than average everywhere else. Chad Johnson* (12.15) was second banana again to Quatro Cinco, but Thomas Jones (11.05) was better than his brother Julius has been. Antonio Gates (5.90) had the rare off week, while Clinton Portis (5.45) was either distracted by the escalating tension between Turkey and the Kurds of northern Iraq, or he didn't watch enough film of the Green Bay defense. It was tough to tell. Maybe demoting Clinton to the pit crew of a USAR Hooters Pro Cup race team for a week or two is what Joe Gibbs needs to do to motivate his #1 back.
*Chad Johnson will no longer be referred to by his self-imposed nickname, Ocho Cinco. Once another player on your own team has surpassed your performance, you must go back to being referred to by your given name.
Sliding back into the basement this week are The Outlaws. It could only be expected when the running backs in the starting lineup combined for less than 1 point (Rudi Johnson 0.40, Michael Turner 0.40). It was the antithesis of the backfield started by The Maestro. Fortunately, Chris Cooley (23.25) and Donte Stallworth (22.80) had great games, while Tony Romo (26.43) did okay after a shaky start. The Giants defense (10.00) and Nick Folk (9.00) were solid for a defense and kicker, but Lavernaeus Coles (2.35) was abysmal, no matter what position he may have been trying to play. Coles' problem is obviously that he has the speed to get deep on anyone but plays with a QB that needs hurricane force winds behind him to get the ball more than 17 yards down the field.
Notes:
- The Outlaws have first crack at available free agents, followed by The Dominator, The Bouncers, The Dragons, the Kellogg Krushers, and The Maestro.
- How about those Rockies? Winning 21 out of 22 is nearly impossible, even when you successfully stack a Little League team. Clint Hurdle looks like a genius right now, as everything he does turns up roses. That means next season he'll take himself too seriously, make some really bad decisions, and ride the Rocks right back to mediocrity. There's a name for that...it's called Dusty Baker Syndrome. Someone get Hurdle a crate of toothpicks.
- Give it up to the national football experts that tabbed the Packers and Buccaneers as two of the three best teams in the NFC through this point. Save your energy, because none of the talking heads or fiction writers actually predicted it. Now, if you called for the Saints and/or 49ers to be one of the top teams, well, you're not in a very exclusive group. Just goes to show why they keep building casinos in Las Vegas.
- The Kings go down to Las Cruces, NM to play Dallas tonight in a homecoming of sorts for a former Kings point guard and current coach...Randy Brown. Okay, Reggie Theus will probably get a lot more attention, even though Randy provided a lot of memorable moments in North Mexico, including the night in early 1990 when he banked in a half court shot at the buzzer in overtime to beat UNLV. That loss was the last one the Rebels would suffer until the following season's Final Four when they lost to Duke.
Well, that's a wrap for this week. Be safe and do great things, gentlemen.
The Commish
posted by Patrick Zalasky at 9:15 AM
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